September 24, 2012

Patahan #65

Selain melalui sedekah dan shalat dhuha, ternyata mengundang rezeki juga bisa dilakukan melalui rajin bangun pagi. Seandainya aku tahu hadits ini dari dulu, berarti sering absen dong yah waktu pembagian rezeki huhuhu soalnya hobi ngantuk dan sering ketiduran setelah subuh ._____.
Dari Fatimah Az-Zahra, "Pada suatu pagi Rasulullah SAW lewat di depanku dalam keadaan aku sedang berbaring. Sambil membangunkanku dengan kaki, beliau bersabda 'Hai Anakku, bangun, saksikanlah rezeki Tuhanmu sebab Allah membagikan rezeki kepada manusia di waktu fajar mulai menyingsing hingga matahari terbit' " (HR Baihaqi)
Lagipula rezeki itu bisa dalam bentuk apa saja, bukan hanya materi, mungkin dalam bentuk kesehatan, teman, pasangan yang baik, kemudahan dalam bekerja, atau hal yang indah-indah dan baik lainnya. Wallahu A'lam :)

Jadi benarlah kalimat ini: sleep early, wake up early, and be wealthier! 

Do You Know What The Best Thing is?

Do you know what the best thing is? You can calm me down when I feel bad then say 'everything is okay'.

Regret is something that I do not really expect but haunt me often. I feel it when I can't do the best for people I love or I can't satisfy to the things I've done. I'm just trying to handle my negative feeling by focusing to what I still can change instead of blaming myself for the things that do not run well as what I want. I need to appreciate me more.

Do you know what the best thing is? You can let me stay beside you in hours without any boredom and still... I've never felt it is enough. I feel so secure. And when you hold me, yeah, I feel so peaceful and more secure.


I hate when I have to say goodbye and feel like a big losing. I feel like being left without nobody actually leaves me. I hate when time goes fast and I still want to be together - do simple activities, have chitchat, eat together, and look into your eyes deeply. Deeply - until I can inhale gratefulness get into my lungs. I am so grateful.

Do you know what the best thing is? You can inspire me day by day to be someone better with eternal dreams and keep being closer to Allah by sharing happiness to others, to parents, to friends, and not to give up easily. Pray harder and believe.

Do you know what the best thing is? This happiness.

And this spirit that makes me feel alive. Please, do not ever leave me. Nobody said it was easy. No one ever said it would be this hard.  

Allah, please guard us to be on Your way. Allah, bless us and do not ever leave us. Allah, please keep these hearts in place and forgive us if our love to Your creations exceeds our love for You.

Image taken from here.

#23 Self Note: Ada yang Salah

Akhir-akhir ini saya sering marah pada diri sendiri. Ada saja sebabnya, entah karena lelah atau terlalu banyak mendengar opini. Padahal diri sendiri tak baik diperlakukan seperti itu.
Karena meremehkan diri sendiri itu tugas orang lain :)
Seperti kemarin, saya marah pada diri sendiri karena kesulitan dalam mata kuliah Bahasa Mandarin. Sebenarnya bukan hanya saya, tapi mungkin hampir seisi kelas. Saya tidak mampu menangkap apa yang dikatakan dalam sesi listening oleh dosen. Entah itu huruf c, q, j memiliki pelafalan yang sama, demikian pula untuk z, sh, z, x, zh daaan cincau capcai fuyunghaiiii... oh dear, I don't know what I'm doing here. Namun, ternyata asal tebak membuahkan hasil juga. Tidak terbiasa, mungkin, masih harus beradaptasi. Bahkan untuk bisa mahir Bahasa Inggris pun butuh bertahun-tahun untuk berlatih.
Sepertinya saya terlalu keras pada diri sendiri :)
Saya marah pada diri sendiri karena sering mubazir perasaan. Dan apa yang paling menyebalkan dari liburan? Saya rentan merasa kesepian, dan kesepian tidak baik untuk kesehatan. Lalu saya jadi malas bicara. Harusnya saya sadar bahwa saya punya ayah dan ibu yang selalu merindukan saya. Yang khawatir berlebihan walaupun saya hanya sedang sakit perut biasa. Ibu bilang, "Banyak-banyaklah bersyukur. Kita merasa ada yang salah karena kadang kita kurang bersyukur, nak". Dan ibu menambahkan, "Masih single lho, nanti kalau berumah tangga lebih banyak lagi masalahnya. Lebih besar lagi sabarnya. Kalau mama dan abah sudah kebal dengan susah dan dengan asam garam kehidupan". Saya mengerti.
"Jika engkau bersyukur kepadaKu maka niscaya akan Kutambah nikmatKu padamu. Namun jika kau kufur akan nikmat Ku maka sungguh AzabKu sangatlah pedih." (QS. Ibrahim: 7)
Dalam sekejap rasanya ingin pulang saat itu juga. Mengecup ibu. Ibu - yang doanya dan berkahnya dijamin ijabahnya oleh Tuhan.
"Tiga orang yang doanya pasti terkabulkan: Doa orang yang teraniaya, doa seorang musafir, dan doa orangtua terhadap anaknya." (Sunan Abu Daud)
Saya marah pada diri sendiri lalu Allah tiba-tiba menyadarkan saya. Hati jadi keras karena ada yang hilang. Mungkin itu, saya kehilangan sujud yang hikmat. Padahal Allah sangat sayang dan merindu. Lalu saya dipertemukan oleh sebuah buku, "Tuhan, Maaf Kami Sedang Sibuk" dan merasa malu. Dalam sepi itu dan setelah mendengar suara ibu, saya menangis keras. Sudah lama tidak menangis dan minta dipeluk yang lama oleh Pencipta. Lalu hati saya lega dan saya kembali dipertemukan oleh sebuah firman dalam AlQuran,
"Hai orang-orang yang beriman, bersabarlah kamu dan kuatkanlah kesabaranmu dan tetaplah bersiap siaga (di perbatasan negerimu) dan bertakwalah kepada Allah, supaya kamu beruntung." (QS Al Imran : 200). 
Dan saya menangis lagi. Terima kasih Allah, kini saya tahu apa yang salah. Dan saya akan terus belajar mengendalikan perasaan-perasaan negatif ini :)
"Karena idealnya, bukanlah bahagia yang membuat kita bersyukur, namun merasa bersyukurlah yang memberikan kita kebahagiaan".

Hei, dan sepertinya saya butuh jalan-jalan! Juga butuh disayang! LOL :)

September 23, 2012

I Hate That Movie

I've never been this terrible after watching such a disappointing movie before. I felt so regretful because of choosing that movie and it successfully disturbed my mood and part of my Sunday. First, it gave bad image of teddy bear which used to be cute and calming. I love teddy bear and I have two on my bed. I can't accept it ._____.

Second, it was far from my expectation. The review which said it was hilarious funny couldn't make me feel the same. I put the straight face from the beginning until the middle and screamed silently, "Please, I don't know what I'm doing here!". I wanted to cry because it was full with inappropriate scenes, bad attitudes and slang jokes... and someone beside me gave sign, "We chose the wrong movie". It was awkward because there are some moments I tried to close his eyes and he closed mine in sudden. "You are not old enough to watch it", he warned me. I covered my face. Oh God, forgive me :(

And third, I think the movie would be much better without those unimportant scenes. The story of relationship between the main actor and actress was quite inspiring and romantic. But that bear... destroyed it. Go away, bear!

Go away, bear! >:|
Overall, I just could laugh in the last minutes when the scene was purely funny, yeah, so-teddy-bear without any additional weird humors. Somehow, it makes me hope that the same-style-movie can be made for children with many good lessons inside, maybe about friendship and about dreams, it will be awesome! I'm sure many kids didn't know and thought the movie with teddy-bear-poster was for them. It was sad realizing that they watched it too, yeah, in cinema.

Maybe I criticize a lot because I don't have comprehensive understanding about movie and I'm old-fashioned. Everyone has right to have different opinion and point of view. Some people may like and some may dislike. But I don't exaggerate. I will be more picky to watch movie in cinema - which is good for my eyes and for my soul.

September 17, 2012

IELTS Try Out

I got a chance to follow IELTS (International English Language Testing System) Try Out by Sun Education Group on September 16, 2012. The event was held in Harris Hotel, Mall Kelapa Gading at 10 a.m. I noticed that there was Kopaja 27 Senen-Kelapa Gading to take me there but I waited for half an hour and there was not any. My eyes were red and irritated because of the heavy smoke. I decided to be back to my dorm and wash my eyes. And finally, I went there by taxi. I wasted much time :(

It was my first time coming to Harris Hotel and also for trying this test. I registered the days before and it was free-of-charge for limited participants. I was so excited because there were many gifts and souvenir like magazine, note book, pens, pencil case, cotton bag, and guiding book for studying abroad. It was priceless experience started by presentation of IELTS overview and some examples of writing tasks. Writing can be in general and academic type based on our purpose. It takes 60 minutes for 2 tasks. Basically, writing task contains of describing graph and charts that you need to write at least 150 words, and composing essays either about agreement-disagreement or problem-solution that need at least 250 words. Essay has higher mark so you should write it first.

some gifts and souvenir :)

Then we moved on to speaking simulation. It's the hardest part of the test. They chose one of us to be a volunteer. Speaking takes 11-14 minutes in 3 parts from introductory of ourselves, our daily activities, describing something like experience when we were so happy, and arguing about many topics from the simplest to the most complicated one like about happiness, human rights, or terrorism. The key is we should not stop talking before the examiner interrupts us. We should not be nervous during speaking test and the more vocabulary that we can express the higher we get the band. Band is the grade as a result of each part that shows our fluency in English. The band is from 1 to 9 and 6.0 is the average for competent speaker. Universities make qualification of the band not less than 6.5. Then we were asked to practice speaking test with our partner. Unfortunately, I came alone and I was sad because it was difficult to find the partner. I met a participant who came alone too. She was a beautiful girl and really good listener. I was so happy to talk with her.

Furthermore, the committee gave us listening and reading test paper. Listening takes 30 minutes in 4 sections and 40 items questions. We should listen carefully because some of the questions are not in multiple choice and asked for answers in two or three words. The reading test takes 60 minutes in 3 sections and 40 items questions. It is same as writing which is divided into academic and general reading. And the readings are quite long. We need to learn scanning for more effective time.

Try Out result would be sent a week later and for the formal test, the result is available for 2 years. The test ended at 1 p.m. and continued with International Education Expo. There was a photo shoot stage too. I wanted so badly to get the picture there with some London decorations. But the participants didn't get voucher for photo shoot because we already had snacks. So sad :( Then I went home and found mikrolet M 37 Senen-Pulo Gadung but I had to stop in Kemayoran because of being the last passenger. The day was so hot! I took bajaj then had a nap directly when I arrived on my bed.

But again, thank youuu, the pretty hot day was saved by choco chip ice cream. It was like a miracle that I could meet him for twice in this weekend. The atmosphere in Cheese Cake Factory Cikini was good with Westlife songs played which were wonderful. But the price of the main course was quite expensive and wholly western so we just ordered ice cream and snacks.

Banana fritter with ice cream :)

The place was homy so I could have comforting chitchat. He's been my inspiration these days. I just figure out that he knows what he should do for present and future. And he completes me. I still fall in love everyday. Thank You Allah :)

By the way, you can download some IELTS test here.

My Saturday :)

Saturday is such a perfect time to hibernate. But I have class to attend on every Saturday morning, so I still have to start my day on 7 a.m. to chase metro mini and not to be late. Like yesterday, I had lecture until 4 p.m. and arrived in my dorm at 5. So it's no difference like in weekdays. But I'm truly grateful because I can review financial management for the advanced one that I take this semester. And it feels like I have my mind blown. I forget a lot, oh dear. I want to pinch myself! Yeah, it was 4 years ago when I learned it :(

I have new close friends in my class - Julia and Sebastian. Three of us have same origin that we are from Medan and we have same spirit to pass financing concentration for next year. We make promise to learn more and not to be influenced by another opinion easily. I need friends like them because I find that working students have more energy than ones who haven't. Maybe the reason is we realize that we need to work hard and save money to pay tuition and we have less time to learn. Besides, financial management class always reminds me to Oselva and our lecturer in STAN - Mr Arvan. He is very smart and teaches us in very good concept and practice. I used to sit next to Oselva, she had passion spreading to me and we discussed much during the class. She is irreplaceable friend.

And after three weeks, finally, I could meet my boyfriend again. After these hectic days, all i want to meet and to talk is him. I always find it difficult to find new place just to have seat and free chitchat without eating or being tired - and mall is so much boring. So we went to Surapati Park. It's been so long that I didn't come here because there was no parking area allowed. But now it's okay to park around.

There were some funny disturbances like many street singers dressed up like woman (you should know) - and we had to prepare some five-hundred rupiahs coins to let them go. LOL.  I wonder that how they looked so grateful to receive the coins and it made me laugh somehow. But I got a beautiful experience. I met street poet named Petrus Adi Wibowo  that I knew from his profile in Jakarta Globe. He's used to being there, going around and reading some of his poets.

me and Pak Petrus :)

I asked him to read poet titled ‘Cinta 90 Persen’ (‘90 Percent Love’) and I noted the best sentences: ‘When you love someone, love the person for only 90 percent, For when things don’t work out, you still have the remaining 10 percent to get back on your feet and love another lover'. 

Yeah, I always love Surapati Park :)

#10 Mei untuk Maret: Hati-hati di Jalan

"Maret, hati-hati di jalan"

"Pasti, aku akan berhati-hati. Kau tidak pernah lupa ya mengucap itu padaku"

"Karena kalimat itu adalah doa dan lebih ringan dibanding kesiapanku untuk mengucap selamat tinggal atau sampai jumpa. Aku akan terus mengucap itu hingga seterusnya pada masa aku menunggumu pulang, duduk di sofa, menyiapkan cemilan, dan membuka pintu. Aku menyambutmu tidak lagi untuk berpisah tetapi untuk bertemu. Kembali ke tempat yang sama yang kita sebut rumah"

 

Image taken from here.

Patahan #64

Hanya Allah yang menguasai waktu dan menggenggam jiwa. Allah sangat sayang. Dia senang kalau hamba-Nya berdoa yang banyak dan berusaha. Karena sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan. Sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan.

Diucap dua kali oleh Allah dalam firman-Nya. Fa inna ma'a al-'usri yusran, inna ma'a al-'usri yusran. Kalimat yang indah dan menguatkan sekali :) (QS Al-Insyirah 5-6)

September 12, 2012

Advice from Master

"We never had any issue on LDR because it didn't really matter somehow...our goal was to get married, so anything within the process was just worth it. Even though we were far away from each other, the idea of "owning" him as "mine" was enough to set free of my worries, and that long period of "me time" actually allowed me to just focus on building myself and my career first. I think he also felt the same way. Being in love should not make us over-dependent on each other that we sorta die when he's not around hehehe... Love should provide the freedom and positive energy to become what we want to be in life because we want to make each other proud and we know we'll always support each other. So it's about two souls, united, becoming two better souls".
Such a good advice. Yeah, there it is. Love should make us better and strengthen each other!  Thanks kak diana :)

#9 Mei untuk Maret: Apa yang Aku Lakukan Ketika Merindukanmu?

Dear Maret,

Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku mengirimkanmu puisi di siang hari untuk kau dengar sebelum tidur. Simpanlah, itu puisi-puisi kesukaanku. Jika kau pikir itu mengganggu, pasrah pada sinyal yang tak tentu justru lebih membuatku terganggu. Akhir-akhir ini aku harus beradu cepat dengan waktu yang tak ramah dan mengambil alih perhatianmu hingga aku menjadi mudah marah. Tenanglah, aku menyimpan amarah itu sendiri dan akan kulampiaskan pada pengemudi yang tak tahu diri hampir menabrak para pejalan kaki yang berlari-lari seperti dikejar hantu setiap pagi. Tak apa, anggap saja mereka buta warna sehingga tak bisa membedakan warna merah dan hijau seperti katamu atau tak punya cukup dana untuk membeli mobil bagus dengan rem kualitas bagus sehingga etika sering kali tergadai untuk menutupi biaya gengsi dan malu. Loh Maret, kenapa aku jadi seperti akan menyusun essay dan curhat begitu? Ah iya, aku memang kangen curhat padamu.

Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku menulis banyak tanpa kenal waktu. Jika tak sempat menulis di kertas atau koneksi internet membuat tuan segi empat yang setia di meja kamar menjadi lemah dan mengantuk, maka aku merangkumnya dalam pikiranku dan membiarkan sang tokoh di kepalaku mendongengkannya setiap malam. Sesekali dia datang saat aku berdiri dalam metro mini atau menyusun laporan yang harus selesai sore hari, dia masih saja bisa nyelip di laci memori. Loh Maret, kenapa aku jadi pengkhayal melulu? Ah iya, kamu pun banyak mondar-mandir di pikiranku tanpa izin dulu. Apa aku di kepalamu juga sering iseng begitu?

 Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku mencatat target belajar dan pekerjaanku hari itu dan mengerjakannya dengan rajin seperti pesanmu. Atau jika tidak, dengan sebisaku. Aku tak sabar untuk menceritakan keberhasilanku atau keberanianku mengalahkan ketakutanku. Begitupun kamu, aku yakin kita bisa menghadapi semua yang terbentang satu-satu. Aku ingin menjadi rajin, karena seperti katamu, aku bertanggung jawab pada diriku sendiri. Lagipula Allah suka hamba yang rajin. Aku ingin dikasih hadiah dan diberi kemudahan untuk segera bertemu kamu. Loh Maret, kenapa aku jadi pamrih begini? Ah iya, tak apa, Allah kan baik sekali.

Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku banyak bersujud pada Dzat yang mengendalikan hati manusia, hatiku dan hatimu. Rindu membuatku bersyukur dan menjadikanku dekat dengan-Nya dan seakan terhubung denganmu. Saat aku tak mampu melakukan apapun, aku berdoa yang panjang dan membujukNya agar kamu sehat-sehat selalu dan didekatkan pada yang kamu mau. Saat aku merasa tak mungkin berbuat apapun, aku percaya bahwa Allah Maha Menghendaki segala sesuatu asalkan bersabar dan berikhtiar. Lagipula yang baik untuk manusia belum tentu baik di sisi-Nya jadi berserah saja. Loh Maret, kenapa aku jadi bijak begini? Ah iya, kan baru belajar. Hidup dan waktu yang jadi pengajar.

Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku bermain-main dengan rencana. Mencari tahu tempat ini dan itu agar siapa tahu suatu hari kita bisa kesana. Makan yang enak dan makan yang banyak. Atau jalan-jalan sampai kelelahan. Ah Maret, tapi apa kau mau? Jika tidak mau, dengar saja ceritaku ya. Aku akan mencobanya sendiri. Asalkan janji, jangan iri. Tapi kalau kau tak iri, aku bisa menangis berhari-hari. Ah ternyata, kau memang tak peduli. Pantas saja orang bilang kalau wanita memang susah dimengerti.


Apa kau tahu yang aku lakukan ketika merindukanmu?

Aku menjadi mudah berair mata. Ada nyeri di dada yang datang sesekali atau sebongkah perasaan yang mampir di sekitar rahang sehingga membuatku sulit tersenyum dengan riang. Tapi jangan sering begitu, katamu, tak baik untuk kesehatan. Nanti cepat tua! Ah, aku kan ingin cantik. Bagaimana dong? Air matanya sering nyelonong keluar sendiri, Maret. Aku terlalu cepat terbawa perasaan. Lalu aku bisa berubah menjadi iri hati pada mereka yang bisa bertemu sesuka hati. Tapi tetap saja tak mensyukuri. Ah, mungkin memang lebih baik aku menjauhi film, fiksi, atau lagu yang sedih-sedih. Walaupun kau tahu, aku suka sekali genre melankolis semacam itu.

Pada akhirnya, aku hanya ingin berpesan bahwa aku akan selalu ada untuk mendukungmu. Janganlah kalah dengan kesibukanmu, yang membuat kita terpedaya seperti tak lagi menyapa atau lupa kepada Pencipta. Janganlah berpaling dengan keakuanmu, yang menyulitkanmu meluangkan waktu entah beberapa menit dari seribu empat ratus empat puluh menit yang dikasih Tuhan dalam sehari. Aku tak perlu banyak, Maret. Sedikit saja. Percayalah, yang sedikit itu bisa membantuku memperbaiki hariku. Dan aku merasa berharga. Aku merasa diinginkan. Bukankah itu perasaan yang membuat kita bahagia, Maret?

Saat aku menulis ini, aku pun sedang merindukanmu Maret. Selalu. Rasa yang tumbuh dengan ranum dan terlalu. Kau tahu yang aku lakukan saat ini dalam keriduanku? Aku diam, Maret. Aku terbiasa diam. Aku ingin kau belajar untuk tahu perasaan itu melalui dirimu. Dan aku pikir kamu telah belajar banyak, Maret. Terima kasih. Aku merindukanmu. Ah iya, pada akhirnya ego harus mengalah. Aku tak tahan untuk tak mengucap itu. Hei, aku merindukanmu! :)

Image taken from here.

Weird!

I’m learning to balance my life these days like waking up earlier then drinking cold water mixed with honey and eating some fruits in the morning. Water with honey is very good for health like what Rasulullah used to do in the morning. It can clean saliva, stimulate digestive system and make you fit all day. It works!

I’m trying to leave office on time so I can come back to my boarding house for a while and take a bath before going to lecture. After having Magrib prayer, I walk fast and chase the bus. It needs an hour to arrive but I feel much fresher and more energy to study. Inappropriate sweat sometimes makes you feel terrible. So I think it can be good idea sometimes. Besides, I learn to focus on my duty better and work more efficiently to be accomplished in time.

Also, I’m urging myself not to be disturbed by unimportant things and for example, yes, I have such a weird behavior. I can’t bare myself to see any dust or falling hair in my room. If there it is, I can’t sleep so I will collect the hair on the floor one by one, repeat it two and three times, and take tissues or disinfectant to clean the dust or any bothering views. I am so sensitive about these and used to doing it almost every night. Unfortunately, my hair falls often so it means the more I feel terrible about cleaning. But I think it’s not that bad. My mom gets that behavior too. She can’t stand to find out any dirty stuff then clean it directly and she can sweep the rooms for many times a day and not be easily satisfied after cleaning up. And those habits are inherited to me. LOL.

September 8, 2012

#8 Maret untuk Mei: Hatimu Adalah Rumahku, Dan Selalu Begitu.

Dear Mei,

Tak peduli seberapa jauh aku melangkah atau selama apa aku pergi, aku pasti akan kembali padamu. Karena kau adalah rumah - tempatku bersandar dengan nyaman dan bercerita dengan aman. Karena kau adalah rumah - tempatku meminta dukungan dan merayakan kebahagiaan.

Tak peduli berapa banyak orang yang aku temui atau hal-hal yang aku amati, aku pasti akan kembali padamu. Karena kau adalah ruang rindu yang kupupuk dengan sujud dan syukur yang syahdu. Karena kau adalah ruang rindu - yang hanya satu. Dan membuat ladang harapanku bertumbuh setiap waktu.

Pada akhirnya, kita selalu butuh tempat untuk pulang bukan? Begitu pun aku. Aku membutuhkanmu.

Tetaplah menjadi bangunanku yang menyangga saat aku lemah dan menyambut dengan riang saat aku datang. Tak ada yang lebih baik dari itu.


Hatimu adalah rumahku, dan selalu begitu.

Image taken from here.

September 7, 2012

Patahan #63

Having wide point of view will save you out from the pathetic way of thinking :)

Sometimes I feel upset with men who are used to ignoring women's role in life or assuming that women are not proper to be good in academic and carrier. Sadly, people force their opinions by bringing some certain customs or religions without being well-mannered and bringing comprehensive understanding itself.

I keep learning because it is the way to appreciate myself as a woman. I keep learning because I believe Allah loves everyone who has willingness to gain knowledge and utilizes his/her ability for another people. I keep learning because it's the shortest road to change the history line of family, to rescue from poverty, and to move on toward the better life.

Do not worry, as a woman, we know when and where to stop. We used to be taught and raised with that nature. And no doubt, Allah is indeed very kind giving women so many favors like to have deep feeling, to be multitasking, to build great instinct, to be strong hiding the pain, and to have a lot of roles in life: as daughter, sister, friend, being the most beautiful bless as a God's creation completing the man - as a wife and having the best job in the world - as a mother. And we will not forget that role, never :)

I'm a woman and I'm so grateful of being that way. Thank You Allah.

September 4, 2012

#22 Self Note: Be Strong and Stronger Then :)

Finally, I go to university again! It means one of my two resolutions in 2012 has been reached. I hope I will get the progress for the second one soon before the year ends :)

Deciding university is a big confusion and you have to consider with the office hours and official activities besides the budget of your savings. But I really want to go to state university and at least get S1 degree. It is one of my dream :)

I once enrolled myself in a private university in Kuningan area. Unfortunately, it didn't open management class because of the lack of participants but I insisted to choose management when the committee asked me to turn to accounting. I chose to ask refund and searched for another place. But for the gift, I got new Alma-mater coat for collection, yeah :p

After that, my boyfriend got some info and he asked me to register to 'alih program' in Universitas Negeri Jakarta. I did online registration and prepared myself to follow the test. I bought a book of selection-test for state university not only for facing the test but also for waking up my brain. Huhuhu. The selection was held on July and would be announced on August. After waiting anxiously and the crazy traffic of site that couldn't be reached that day, I passed the test and became one from another thirty participants accepted in management class. It was blessing of mother's prayer. Thank You Allah.

I am so grateful and Allah is indeed very kind. I can go to state university with department that I want and the tuition is quite affordable. In my deepest heart, I still crave for the state university with yellow-jacket in Salemba but I can't handle the tuition which is too expensive for me that means taking almost my whole saving. But life is choice. Like my friend said, "When you want X-factor, you need to sacrifice Y-factor". And no doubt that Allah knows the best for me. Life needs rationality too :)

Sometimes I hope I can feel learning experience there for once in my life time like following English conversation class in Depok every weekend but it clashes with my lecturing class and I need to meet my boyfriend that I miss everyday and I just can see once in two or three weeks. But still, I have to be very grateful. Again, Thank You Allah.

After converting the transcript, there are many majors that I have to accomplish and I need 2,5 years to graduate. In this case, I just realize that your GPA and score in D3 influence a lot in conversion result so you don't need to study over the majors that you have passed before. It means it's going to shorten your lecturing time and focus on choosing your concentration majors. I hope I don't need more semester to pass, please. Graduating soon, getting married soon. LOL.

Now my days are very full. The schedule is from Monday to Saturday that means I have to manage my time carefully. I often feel so tired that I can sleep directly without changing my clothes and cleaning up and it's not a good habit. But I have quite fun. I can find many friends from various background and another world outside the job that will enrich my life.

Be strong and stronger, then :)

September 2, 2012

Patahan #62

"Jika kau bisa bersikap baik dan manis dengan rekan kerjamu, kenapa tidak dengan pasanganmu?"


 Sometimes I wonder.

random pict from google